54: Wow, it’s 54!

I haven’t been keeping track of my countdown for quite a while now, what with all the craziness that has passed and the craziness that is still going on – the holidays, dissertation writing, revision for my journal article, and other stuff that I haven’t been able to deal with since I came back from my two-week visit to family in Texas. So much has happened since my last December post till today, that it gives me a headache just thinking about them. The good thing is that they were mostly nice things. 🙂 And I’ m glad I took a pause tonight to get back to the countdown. This downtime tonight helped me think about the things I need to accomplish soon and to put things in perspective. It’s weird that I haven’t really thought about what I want to do for the coming year (I am usually good at putting aside special time to think things through)… Maybe it’s because there is a need for me to be short-sighted for the next few months. The biggest hurdle to my planning and thinking ahead is this thesis dissertation. It’s ironic how it is my ticket to a new chapter of my life at the same time, I find it a hurdle to planning the rest of my life after graduate school. Well, it’s not really a hurdle, but my inner voice is telling me to be cautious about what lies ahead because I don’t want to expect too much or plan way ahead – I don’t want to be disappointed. But I think I have to define for myself what I want to do after graduate school. Do I take the path of academia and be a full-fledged researcher in the university setting? Do I take a job in the industry? Do I switch gears and pursue something that I am recently very interested in – science policy? I’m still not sure… as of now, I have decided to apply to as many postdoctoral trainings, fellowships, job opportunities as I can.  As for my personal life, I have grown attached to the friendships I’ve made here in MA, that it will be hard for me to leave and start anew, especially now that I am starting to care too much for one particular person.  I even thought of looking for opportunities only in MA, so that I could stick around and give “this” a chance.  I’ve never been in a place longer than I have been in Worcester (7 years and 4months…), even including my childhood days (we moved a lot).  MA is starting to feel like home, and right now, I am not ready to leave it.  Not yet.  However, I might change my mind if I do get a good offer from out of state though… but then again I am limiting the job search to MA. so there you go. 😉

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